Saturday, September 5, 2009

Starting Off on the Right Foot after a Rough Beginning

New beginnings are always refreshing. My daughter starts Kindergarten this Tuesday (probably already has by the time anyone reads this). Of course, I have high hopes for her despite the fact that this past week has been quite trying for our family. An unexpected illness landed me in the hospital and turned many of my plans upside down. And I am definitely a planner. I organize, make lists, try to anticipate all upcoming appointments, jobs, events, etc. I put a lot of stress on myself, and that's probably a big part of my problem and why I may have come down with a severe case of asthma that has never been a part of my history or background.

I've never smoked or suffered from allergies before and, other than what I thought was a regular cold I caught a few weeks ago and other annoying but minor ailments I've suffered from lately, most of them more chronic than serious, I've been pretty healthy most of my life. Besides one small surgery and the birth of my daughter, this was only the third time I'd been overnight in a hospital and actually the longest hospital stay of my life. I've seen more doctors and had more tests done than I've had in years. I'm not one who likes to go to doctors regularly, but there was no choice in this matter. I was having severe breathing attacks, coughing spasms, and felt generally miserable. I couldn't eat or sleep and could hardly talk. It was a very frightening experience. Compounding it, of course, was my concern for my young daughter. I knew she was worried about me and was also nervous about starting school. It was a hard time for her, and I wanted to be there for her.

I had also been told to remove the new cat we had recently taken in from our house, even though several doctors agreed he wasn't the cause of the problem because, before the loss of my beloved Floppy two years earlier, I'd had cats all my life but that, because of my sensitivity, it would not be a good idea to have the new cat around for awhile. It broke my heart to have to do this and I knew it hurt my daughter although she understood it was to help mommy feel better, but we were lucky that a relative was able to temporarily board the cat while I was recovering.

Other concerns, although less paramount emotionally but still of significant importance, were my having to be away from both my jobs, my real life one as a librarian and the one I have been doing in Second Life for almost a year now publishing an online magazine about a virtual world. While worries about my real life job mounted because my sick leave was used up, my boss was very understanding that my health had to come first before I could consider coming back to work. Likewise, my staff on RezLibris took over handling the monthly production work so that I could take my time recovering. They knew that even though the magazine was not a regular paying job to me, it is still very important to me.

So it's been rough. I'm home now and starting to recover gradually. I'll be off from work a little longer and also taking a break from my virtual world endeavors, too. I'm concentrating on my health and learning to relax more which can only aid my recovery. I'll spend some quality time with my daughter and see her get started at school. It's been a hard start for both of us, but we'll get through it. That's about it as far as my plans because I've learned that planning really doesn't work when anything can happen to interrupt those plans. It's one step at a time now; day to day. That's the way you start. That's the way you go on.